One of my most difficult students has been gone for the past week and a half.  To be honest part of me was happy she wasn't there.  My days were be a lot more calm and the appearance of any gray hair was put off for another day.  The problem I have with that is realizing that I really shouldn't feel that way as a teacher and especially as a Christian teacher.  Yes, it would be much more enjoyable to only teach the good kids or the bright kids. That isn't what we as teachers are called to do.  We are called to teach all students.  It is the struggling students and the difficult that need us the most.   I am sure Jesus much have felt some consternation when the disciples never got it!  I  prayed for her as much as possible (though I never prayed for her to be absent).  I found out today that she has transfered to another school.  She is out of my hair but the reasons for acting the way she does are still there.  I just pray that her new teacher will have the patience, kindness and loving attitude that I felt like I oftern lacked. The hardest thing is not knowing if I really ever made any kind of impact in her life.

The funny thing about grace, that I have been learning, is that the person needing grace needs to realize they need it in order to be effective.  That is the way it is with our Christian walk.  Once we become self-righteous we feel we don't need it.  We feel we are good enough or we can do it on our own.  I often think people don't come to Christ because they simply don't have faith.  That maybe so but I wonder if it is the grace part that throws people.  I am excited that God's offer of salvation is a gift, no strings attached because I know I need it because I know the kind of sinner I am.  People don't like to be confronted with that idea, that idea being we are sinners, that idea being the fact we can't do it on our own. 

Does God give us opportunities in our life for us to say no to?  I often think of an door or an opportunity as something to go through (or try in the case of an opportunity).  Maybe we aren't supposed to.  Maybe God wants us to say no sometimes to opportunities even though the door is one we have been looking or waiting for.  I am the kind of person that sees a door and wants to try to go through it and then wait to see if God stops me.  Maybe I need to see a door and wait to see if God pushes me through or wait to see it in fact there is a different door God has in store for me. 

Currently Reading How to Be Idle By Tom Hodgkinson see related

I get kind of scared thinking about having another child.  I absolutely love Alan and love spending time with him.  Ruth, Alan and I play almost every night after supper.  I wonder how another child will change that.  We have been way blessed with Alan.  I wish I could say it was something that we did (some great parenting tip I could pass on) but it really is the grace of God.  Maybe we should quit while "we are ahead".  That isn't the best way to put it but I think you will hopefully understand. 

I am reading a book called How to be Idle.  Probably not a good book for me.  It is very interesting because it shows how we went from very easy going life style to the fast paced way too busy lifestyle that we all now "enjoy".  There was a time, especially in Europe, when people had a great deal more free time on their hands and they enjoyed their leisure time.  Their leisure time definitely wasn't full going from one trip or adventure to another.  They enjoyed doing nothing.  It reminds me of my younger days when I swore I would never spend my free time (usually weekends and the occasional snow day) busy.  Lo and behold it now seems there isn't enough time not only in the weekend, but not enough days in the weekend.  Of course, if I ever do spend the occasional free time doing something as awful as reading I am beaten down with incredible feelings of guilt.

It is definitely a book I would highly recommend.

I recently read a devotion where the author talked about how radical Christianity is.  It then went on to talk about how comfortable we in the North American church are.  It got me to think about the scripture passage where Christ talks about heaven and who will get in.  Some he will welcome in and others he will say that he did know them.  Are we radical?  I am gulty of living that comfortable lifestyle.  I go to church regularly, volunteer when needed, I tithe.  How many of these things are really impacting the world for Christ?  I invite an occasional friend to church, but I usually stay in my Christian community.  In some ways it is easy to be a Christian because truth be told, not much is really expected from me.  I can coast through life if I wanted. 

Jesus said to the rich young ruler to sell everyhting and give it all to the poor and follow him.  My family wouldn't let me do that!  Jesus said that his message would split up families, How many times have I comprimised what I truly believed was Biblical becuiase I wanted us all to get aqlong!  How many of us will Jesus welcome into paradise and how many of us, who thought we were living a good Christian life will Jesus say that he didn't know us?